Tuesday, May 29, 2007


unless you want to hear my misery.

Motherhood is a lonely job. We give up our jobs, our husbands, our friends, and our lives to take care of our babies, toddlers, and preschoolers. When they are little, we are trapped in our homes by diaper changes, feeding times, and naps. Then, they get older, start school, make their own friends, and leave us for their own fun. We get left at home alone then too.

When we do get out, we meet other mommies who have babies our kids age. We may have nothing else in common with these moms, yet we try to form bonds over our children. When the children drift on to the next phase, so do we. Lasting friendships? Maybe. But especially in the Silicon Valley, what is a lasting friendship good for anyway? Phone calls and overnight visits hours away when one or the other of you moves to a new location. How many of us really have someone to call up and say, "Hey, let's get lunch!" or "Want to meet me for coffee?"

Ok..that's the end of my rant today. If you got this far, thanks for reading. If not, I totally understand. It's very negative today.


Lori said...

I'm the only one from my close group of girlfriends from high school that is married with kids. I have one friend that is married and I just learned a few weeks ago she's pregnant. They all live many states away...so it felt very lonely in the beginning with no one to talk to that could understand anything I was going through. And they have lives during thw work hours working which is when I most needed an ear. I totally understand what you're talking about...

It is nice meeting other moms but it's all brand new friendships you need to work on which is hard to do when you have the kids to mind. I don't know...it sure is hard and lonely at times but I keep myself busy immersing myself in my kids' daily activities and use what time I have of peace during naptime and bedtime to take care of the house, maintain a good bond with hubby and also try to create a sense of self doing some little activity not related to the kids...I'd say it's getting easier now that the kids are getting older.

I feel it's still all worth it seeing how much they enjoy me being the center of their world and the wonderful personalities they're developing. It feels good to know I help to create these great kids that also bring smiles to passerby, who are curious about the world around them, and who ask great questions to amuse my days.

In a few years they'll be at school and I'll return to work and hope to gain more of that world back while still enjoying new phases of motherhood -- the ones I remember most of my mom while I was growing up :-)

The Pizzitola Family said...

Yep...a little depressing. is this because Marcy is moving??
Lvoe ya!

Violet the Verbose said...

I hear you, Lynda. I'm a little happier here with a neighbor I can hang out with. We see each other almost every day without really planning anything. It keeps us both sane.